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Gender identity refers to a person’s inner sense of their own gender; whether they feel themselves to be a man, a woman, both, neither, or something else entirely. This may align with the sex assigned to them at birth, but it doesn’t have to. Gender is a spectrum, not simply a binary of male or female. This means there are many different ways people can experience and express their gender.

Traditionally, gender has been viewed as binary: two fixed options, man or woman. However, modern understanding recognises that gender is far broader than these two categories. Knowledge in this area has grown considerably in recent decades, allowing more space for people to experience and define their gender in ways that are true to themselves.

Examples of Gender Identities

Man: Traditionally associated with those assigned male at birth, though men can experience and express their masculinity in many different ways.

Woman: Traditionally linked to those assigned female at birth, but womanhood can be experienced and expressed in countless forms.

Non-binary: Refers to people who don’t identify solely as a man or a woman. They may feel their gender exists somewhere in between or entirely outside the binary. Non-binary people may use a variety of terms, including genderqueer, genderfluid, agender, or bigender.

Genderfluid: For those whose gender identity shifts over time. Someone may feel more masculine at one point, more feminine at another, or somewhere in between at different times.

Agender: People who do not identify with any gender at all, and see themselves as having no gender.

Bigender: People who identify with two genders, such as both man and woman, and may move between them depending on context or feeling.

Two-Spirit: A term from some Indigenous cultures in North America, used to describe a person who embodies both masculine and feminine energy. It is a cultural concept, specific to certain Indigenous traditions.

Demigender: For those who feel only partially connected to a gender. For example, a demiboy may feel partly male but not entirely.

Intergender: For those whose identity lies somewhere between male and female, but who don’t fully identify as non-binary.

And more: There are many other identities, and new terms emerge as our understanding grows. You don’t need to label yourself unless you wish to, you are who you are.

Queer: our personal favorate, as it can encompass a wide range of gender identities, sexualities, and expressions without being overly specific.

Why Gender Identity Matters

Gender identity is about how someone experiences themselves and how they present themselves to the world. It relates to self-respect, authenticity and the ability to live openly. Understanding and expressing one’s gender in an authentic way is vital for mental health and overall wellbeing.

When people are not free to express their gender identity, it can lead to feelings of anxiety, depression, and isolation. This is why it’s essential to create safe, supportive environments where people can explore and live their gender identity without fear of judgement.

Gender is a Spectrum

Gender is not fixed or rigid, it’s a spectrum of identities and expressions. What feels certain for one person may be shifting and evolving for another. We must allow everyone the space to explore and live their gender in their own way.

If you’re questioning your gender identity, remember: there is no deadline. It’s a process of self-discovery, and you have the right to take it at your own pace.

Animism is the understanding that everything, every stone, tree, river, and breath of wind, is alive with spirit. Many cultures hold this as a quiet truth: the world is not just a backdrop for human life but a living, breathing community of beings.

Shamanism takes this awareness a step further. It is animism in motion. Where animism recognises life in all things, shamanism engages with it. It is an active relationship, listening, speaking, exchanging, and co-creating with the spirits of nature, ancestors, and unseen realms.

A shaman’s role is not simply to believe in this living web but to participate in it. This can mean journeying into altered states to meet spirit allies, holding ceremonies to honour seasonal changes, or tending to the needs of land and water spirits as one would tend to the needs of human neighbours.

In active animism, there is responsibility. It is not enough to admire the beauty of a river; one must ask the river what it needs. It is not enough to take herbs for healing; one must offer thanks, song, or prayer to the plant’s spirit. Reciprocity is key.

Shamanism is not a distant or abstract philosophy – it happens in the physical, emotional, and spiritual worlds all at once. It is walking through a forest with the same attentiveness one would give to a conversation with a dear friend. It is recognising that every interaction leaves an imprint, and that respect for all life is both a spiritual and practical choice.

In this way, shamanism becomes the active expression of animism: a daily practice of relationship, reverence, and responsibility to the more-than-human world.

Gaining a new insight often comes unexpectedly, like a sudden spark of awareness interrupting your day. These moments can be intense, sometimes even life changing. Think back to learning to ride a bike as a child. At first there’s struggle, maybe even frustration, and then suddenly - you’re cycling! A rush of joy, almost euphoria, takes over.

For adults, insights rarely follow such a clear path. We can distinguish between conscious, deliberate learning and sudden realisations. From a psychological perspective, these experiences engage different neuro pathways in the brain. When we spend an hour studying a new subject, our brain works methodically to absorb and integrate the information. But when a sudden insight strikes - triggered by an experience or a brief interaction - it’s often a rapid, direct form of cognition that switches on instantly.

Insight can be transformative, shifting how we think and act. But not every insight is necessarily beneficial. Misplaced insights can lead to harm. Consider how, in the search for meaning, some people are drawn to extreme beliefs. They may genuinely believe they are doing something good, yet their actions are driven by a distorted understanding of their “insight.”

Still, insights are a powerful tool for growth. Learning, especially when we actively explore new ideas - keeps our minds sharp and healthy. The beauty is that we can invite insights into our lives. Conversations with others can be a rich source of realisation, especially when we choose topics that challenge us to see differently. My grandmother had a word for small talk "prietpraat' meaning talking whitchout words. No, it's the real conversations, deep and raw that are far more stimulating. Reading books, watching thought-provoking films and simply gathering new knowledge, all of these can spark fresh perspectives.

Equally important is taking time to pause and reflect. This is available to everyone and it can do wonders for your brain health. By letting your thoughts flow and observing them - without judgement - you practise a form of cognitive meditation. Sit quietly, allow your thoughts to rise and pass, don’t push them away, just observe. This gentle awareness can lead to surprising new insights, while also strengthening mental wellbeing in much the same way meditation does.

So start today. Seek out new insights, embrace learning, and remember: keeping our minds active and open is one of the most powerful ways to keep our brains healthy.

Sexuality and romantic feelings can be confusing, especially if you’re unsure how to identify the different kinds of attraction. While many people might use the terms sexual attraction and romantic attraction interchangeably, they actually refer to distinct experiences. Let’s explore both concepts and clarify the difference between the two.

What is Sexual Attraction?

Sexual attraction is the desire to be sexually intimate with another person. It can be driven by physical desires, fantasies, or a specific pull toward someone’s appearance. While sexual attraction often includes the wish for physical contact, it’s more than just a physical need - it’s the experience of a particular kind of pull that can lead to sexual desire.

Sexual attraction can look very different from person to person. Some people experience strong sexual desires toward others, while some feel none at all. People can be sexually (and/or romantically) attracted to a wide range of genders. This is commonly referred to as sexual orientation.

What is Romantic Attraction?

Romantic attraction is the desire to form a romantic relationship with someone. This does not necessarily involve sexual feelings. Romantic attraction might make someone want to spend meaningful time together, feel emotionally connected, and form a deeper bond. It is rooted in affection, love, and intimacy without the requirement of sexual interaction.

Just like sexual attraction, romantic attraction can take many forms. Some people are romantically attracted regardless of gender, while others only experience romantic feelings toward specific genders. Romantic orientation can vary widely and is shaped by individual experiences and preferences.

Key Differences Between Sexual and Romantic Attraction

Although sexual and romantic attraction often overlap, they represent different aspects of human connection:

• Sexual attraction is about wanting sexual interaction, while romantic attraction is about wanting emotional closeness or a romantic relationship  without necessarily including sex.

• Sexual attraction can lead to sexual desires or behaviours; romantic attraction focuses on emotional connection and feelings of love.

• Some people may feel no sexual attraction at all - such as those who identify as asexual - yet still have strong romantic feelings. Others may feel sexual attraction but little to no romantic interest, as is the case for some aromantic people.

Why Understanding the Difference Matters

Recognising the difference between sexual and romantic attraction can help you better understand your own feelings and desires. It can also deepen empathy for others. In relationships, this understanding can set clearer expectations and help avoid misunderstandings. For example, if someone feels sexual attraction but no romantic connection, open communication can clarify the nature of the relationship from the start.

Both Types of Attraction Are Valid

Sexual and romantic attraction are both valid and valuable aspects of human relationships. They can exist together or completely independently. There is no single “correct” way to love or feel attracted to someone. Everyone experiences attraction in their own unique way.

By understanding these two types of attraction, we can better appreciate the diversity of human connection and respect the way each person experiences love and desire.

More and more people feel lonely, unheard and unseen. Issues like depression and burnout are becoming increasingly common, and these days it almost seems ‘normal’ to experience a burnout at some point in your life. So normal, in fact, that it can be surprising when someone reaches their fifties without ever having had one. People might think, “They must have an easy job,” or “They probably don’t have kids.” Burnout has almost become a strange kind of badge, proof that you work hard and take adult life seriously. But why do we see it this way?

Depression, on the other hand, is still often taboo and perceived as a weakness. A short-term burnout is socially acceptable, but then you’re expected to ‘be over it’ and get on with life. It’s an odd way of thinking realy. Why are burnout and depression - sometimes even among young, healthy people - so common now?

The Three Types of Burnout

To understand this better, it’s important to know there are three types of burnout: mental, physical and spiritual.

• Mental burnout (the most common): Caused by long-term mental strain and a constant overproduction of stress hormones. People with mental burnout can no longer relax, and their brains become exhausted from processing too much information.

• Emotional/compassion burnout: when you can no longer acces your own emotions are stop caring for those of others. (Often occurs in emotionaly straining jobs like healthcare workers.) 

• Physical burnout: The body shuts down. Often seen in athletes, also known as overtraining.

• Spiritual burnout: Can appear as a crisis in religious belief or personal sense of meaning.
  
  

This article focuses mainly on mental burnout. Clinical psychologist Rachel Andrew’s research shows that mental burnout is often the result of prolonged exposure to too many external stimuli, without enough time for processing. She also found that a lack of face-to-face human contact is a major factor in raising stress levels.

The Role of Human Connection

Our increasingly fast-paced lives have reduced our average attention span from twelve seconds to just eight over the past thirty years. At the same time, we’re exposed to a constant flood of stimuli. Our brains are forced to switch tasks endlessly, leading to mental exhaustion.

Having a deep conversation with someone is actually a way to reset your brain. It requires focus and stillness, pulling you away from the usual flood of distractions. Simply by speaking attentively and with genuine interest, you can release a large amount of built-up tension.

The problem is, most of our social interactions now happen digitally. We think we’re meeting our social needs, but our ‘primitive brain’ processes a digital conversation as just another piece of fleeting information, not as something that provides true connection and calm. That difference between speed and focus is crucial.

Digital chats demand rapid responses, which keep stress hormones active. Face-to-face contact, on the other hand, requires focus and brings calm, triggering the release of hormones that counteract stress. Human connection also stimulates the production of 'happiness hormones' something reading a book, for example, simply can’t match.

Practical Tips for More Calm and Connection

If you want to prevent burnout, contact a friend or family member. Arrange to meet in person. Put your phones on silent and choose a setting that feels peaceful to you both - maybe a forest walk, the beach, or a cosy tea garden. Even if you meet only once a month, make it happen. Talk about your interests, listen with real attention. You’ll notice that not only will you feel calmer, but your relationship will also grow stronger through these shared moments of true presence.

By regularly engaging in meaningful contact, you create space for calm and activate your body’s natural healing processes. It’s a small investment with huge benefits for your mental and physical wellbeing.

Many people have experienced a job or situation where daily criticism or rejection was part of the role. One trainer once put it simply: “Don’t take it personally; you never know what’s going on behind someone’s front door.” That advice can apply far beyond the workplace.

Everyone carries some form of preconception. Sometimes it proves accurate, sometimes not. It’s a human instinct to assess a person or situation quickly. This initial reaction often comes from the amygdala – a tiny, almond-shaped part of the brain that serves as the emotional centre. Its role is to keep us alert to potential threats, so these snap judgements exist for a reason. The choice lies in whether to act on them.

When meeting new people - whether face to face or online - forming an opinion instantly is tempting. A photograph, a brief comment, or a passing glance can trigger an emotional response before a single word is exchanged. The feeling itself isn’t the issue; the decision is in how to respond.

Approaching interactions with openness can lead to unexpectedly positive encounters. Conversations with strangers can turn into moments of genuine connection or humour. Of course, boundaries matter. Not every approach will feel safe or welcome, and everyone’s threshold is different. Personal feelings act as an internal safeguard, and it’s essential to acknowledge and respect them.

Viewing people without clinging to that first emotional reaction allows space for their real story to emerge. Everyone has one, and most remain hidden unless given the chance to share. If a line is crossed, it’s up to the individual to state that clearly, and up to others to respect it.

First impressions are unavoidable, but they don’t have to be the final word. Pausing before judgement, listening, and allowing room for a person’s story can turn a fleeting encounter into something more human  and far more interesting.